playoff time photo fun

before reading this post, hit the play button above.  it will be the soundtrack for what's below.

here is shannon and quin, looking on from the dugout.

and here is jackson, who will be on the mound tonight in yankee stadium, with his infamous and intimidating "smile over the glove." 

here i am, making one of my patented moves, throwing out a speedy baserunner.

and here is caedmon, who starred in his own children's movie about baseball, called "everyone's hero." 

and without further ado, here are the authentically cute ones, featuring quinton as he gets pshyched for the playoffs.  enjoy!  and go yankees!  tame the tigers!

the bribe

"the bribe"

paper collage on hardcover bookboard

september, 2011

gregory a. milinovich

i haven't had much time/energy for collaging recently, but i recently carved out a little time just to glue some things together because my juxtapositional (is that a word?) creative energy was like a caged bird, singing for freedom.  so, i started cutting and gluing, and this is what happened.  i truly wish i had more time to do this stuff, as it really feeds a hunger inside me.  i suppose, like many other things, it is a discipline that i too often neglect, to my own detriment. 

speaking of misplaced priorities, we watched an episode of the new show "new girl" this week, and i absolutely loved it.  i was laughing until my belly hurt.  i'm going to be watching more of that one.  the new nbc show "up all night" which has so much potential, just isn't getting it done. 

the red sox did not make the playoffs.  this is kind of bittersweet for me as a yankees fan because, as much as it brings me tremendous joy that they had such an epic fail, i sort of wanted them in because they were so bad it would have been fun to watch them flounder in the playoffs, especially if it could have been against the yanks.  but, alas, the red sox will have to be content to listen to the playoffs on the radio while driving around in their cahs. 

speaking of baseball, i'll have some pics tomorrow of my family in yankee gear.  it'll be worth checking out.

hope everyone has a great parks and recreation day (oops, i meant thursday). 

review - switchfoot - vice verses

switchfoot's new album "vice verses" came out yesterday, and i've been spinning it non-stop (is it really spinning in an ipod?) since i got it.  i don't know what it is about switchfoot albums that make me want to write reviews, but there's something there because their last studio album ("hello hurricane") inspired me to write a review, as well.  i suppose it comes down to the fact that i just really love this band, and that they keep making art that pleases my ears, feeds my faith, and resonates in my heart long after i push the stop button.  although i've only been listening for 24 hours, this album promises more of the same, as frontman jon foreman's lyrics so often feel like the poetry that lurks just inside my pen that never quite makes its way out.  he just keeps on writing the things i long to say and asking the questions i'm sometimes too scared to ask.  but switchfoot finds a way to say it and ask it and sing it in a way that affirms everything i believe about hope and redemption and abundant life.  if there were a soundtrack to agent orange records, switchfoot would certainly be on it. 

this new album, while musically a slight departure from the past, is essentially just the next logical step for a group that's been pushing some boundaries in Christian music for the last 14 years.  while admittedly trying out a more bass and drum-driven vibe, they certainly haven't surrendered the crunchy guitars, soaring choruses and impassioned vocals that have always been a trademark of the band's brand of power pop rock.  while trying out a new musical wardrobe, i think there may be a few misses on this album (especially "selling the news"), but it is forgivable when you consider that the band isn't content just to rest on their laurels and churn out b-sides from previous recording sessions.  they are still working hard to create new and challenging art, and there is not only much to admire about that, but also much that most of Christendom can learn from it, as well. 

but where the album really shines, in typical switchfoot fashion, is in the lyrics.  refreshingly honest (where is God in the earthquake/where is God in the genocide/where are you in my heartbreak? -from vice verses), relentlessly hopeful (born for the blue skies/we'll survive the rain/born for the sunrise/we will survive the pain - from dark horses), and contagiously full of life (i wonder/why would i wait til i die to come alive/i'm ready now/i'm not waiting for the afterlife - from afterlife).  the themes have remained essentially true to the switchfoot catalog, but it feels a bit more personal this time, with the title track feeling like the honest questions of a man struggling through some difficult questions, and inviting us to be a part of that.  additionally, there seems to be an added emphasis on the contradictions of life, the vice verses, as it were, of living between life and death, faith and doubt, hope and despair, incredible beauty and terrible brokenness.  the reality according to switchfoot, it would seem, is that God is present right there in the midst of those contradictions and juxtapositions, right in the vices and the verses of life. 

this album represents another great addition to the discography of this underrated band, and also demonstrates their commitment to continue to explore their calling as artists and people of faith on a journey.  i highly recommend it. 

nacho macho man

a few weekends ago shannon and the boys traveled down to delaware to visit her brother and their awesome family.  uncle shawn took jack and cade fishing, and you can see here how they did.  it's a sad but true reality that if my boys want to go fishing they have to go with their uncle.  i can't catch a fish unless it's between two buns and covered in tartar sauce.  mmmmmmmm.....tartar sauce. 

don't know why i'm really not into fishing.  i guess it's because it takes time and i'd rather be spending that time re-watching old steeler games for the 47th time.  plus, you have to either get in a boat, or stand on a muddy bank.  i guess if i could go fishing from the comfort of my own mancave, that'd be different.  additionally, fishing requires hooks and wires and something called lures and it all starts to sound a little too much like tools and manly macho stuff that makes me feel like i'd rather just curl up with some chocolate and a good novel.  i am most certianly nacho macho man. 

speaking of what a sissy i am, have you seen that google commercial where the dad is writing emails to his little girl?  o.my.gosh.  makes me cry like a baby everytime.  every dang time. 

who cries at commercials?  it's ridiculous.  it a manipulative tool that is designed to make you feel like you need to buy something, so that a bunch of rich people can get even richer.  and yet all you have to do is throw in some combination of the following and i'm sobbing like a heartbroken 13-year old:
love notes from parents to kids
emotionally charged music of just about any sort.  (with the right music, a banking commercial could make me cry). 
the line: "when you care enough to send the very best"
cute dogs
that five for fighting song about getting older

just typing this list is making me all misty. 

it's okay.  i'm fine with it.  mr. rogers taught me that it's okay to show my emotions.  ahh...i love mr. rogers.  i miss mr. rogers.  i'm sobbing again.  where's my chocolate?

everyone else's superbowl

well, the steelers eeked out a win last night against the peyton manning-less, and then kerry collins-less, colts at the big dome in indy.  yes, the game was a great deal closer than what most people expected, but i had been telling people all week that while i felt like the steelers should get out of there with a win, i wouldn't be surprised if they lost.  i felt that the colts really had something to prove (everyone in the media is writing them off, as if peyton is the only player that matters on that team), and who better to prove it against than the reigning afc champs?  let's face it, the playing the steelers is everyone else's superbowl.

the beginning of the game looked like the steelers would come out swinging and really dominate the game, but a slew of turnovers in the second quarter gave the colts reason to believe, and made it a brand new game.  it didn't help that the strength of the colts defense (defensive ends) corresponds with a glaring weakness on the steelers offense (offensive tackles).  it was messy (as almost every steeler game is), but it looks like a "w" in the record to me, so i'll take it.  here's some pics, and then it's on to the next one. 

saturday song: dark horses

just found out that switchfoot has a new album coming out at the end of this month.  switchfoot, a group of Christian guys san diego, first recorded an album back in 1997 (the legend of chin).  i bought that album that year, and thought i had something that no one else was listening to yet.  i was in college, and something about that album (which they say they just made for their friends, never thinking they'd experience much success), really connected with me.  it's hard for me to believe that was 14 years ago.  i've followed their career pretty closely over those 14 years, seeing them live several times and buying up all of their recordings.  later this month they will release their 8th studio album, 'vice verses.' 

from the single they've released, and what i've read about the album, it seems that the band is going in a slightly new musical direction, handing the keys over to the rhythm section (drums and bass) instead of the guitar.  that doesn't mean the guitar isn't heavily featured, just that the songs will be driven a bit differently.  you can tell for yourself in the song "dark horses" below.  even the guitar has changed as they've gone to a more crunchy sound which is very pleasing to these ears, anyway.  i like the song, and am looking forward to the rest of the album at the end of september.  enjoy!



bonus song:

today my church is holding a free denim giveaway, having collected over 500 pairs of jeans, etc. for our denim drive.  so, for anyone in the sunbury area who needs any denim (or knows anyone who does) come on up to the church (319 catawissa avenue, sunbury) to get some along with a free lunch.  we'll be there from 11am to 2pm.  hope to see you there.  to celebrate, here's an appropriate song. 

random: happy hobbit day, nehemiah

-happy belated birthday to bilbo and frodo baggins, and a happy belated hobbit day to all of you (it was yesterday, 9/22, in case you were wondering.

-huge congrats to the yankees who took advantage of an epic free fall by the red sox and wrapped up the division this week, making them the champions of the american league east.  also a big shout out to russell martin, the canadian catcher who is just wrapping up his first year as a yankee, for giving the press this amazing quote, "i hate the red sox."  couldn't have said it better myself.


-congrats to me on my first fantasy football win of the season.  it is likely my only win of the season, as my team stinks, but it was nice to at least visit the win column once.  it's like a one-time vacation from my normal routine the loser land, where i'm forced sit around and chew my fingernails, hoping that my kicker will somehow kick 17 field goals in one game in order to get me the win. 

-in retrospect, i wish i had chosen all pittsburgh steelers for my fantasy team.  i would still suck, but at least i could just root for my own guys and not have to worry about it.

-parks and rec = aweseome.  ron swanson's beard = even more awesome.  the office without michael scott = okay.  it was like visiting a big group of old friends, without the guy who always made things happen.  with apologies to reggie jackson, michael scott was the straw who stirred the drink. 

-my prediction on the steelers game this sunday night against the colts?  steelers 24, colts 17. 

-i got dressed in the dark this morning (it's my day off).  i apparently grabbed a sleeveless t-shirt from my drawer (why do i even own a sleeveless t-shirt?). it's like looking at a barrel with two straws sticking out the sides. 

-preaching this week on nehemiah.  reminds me of a joke my college Bible professor used to tell about the shortest man in the bible:  knee-high-amiah.  groan.

-currently listening to "symphonies" by dan black.  also, the remix by haus of glitch.  ear candy.

-curretnly reading "mockingjay" by suzanne collins.

-also, i've been reading a walt whitman anthology.  i came across this nugget which i circled and starred, cut out, pasted, and, now, posted on my blog.  gotta keep my eyes wide open with wonder as i discover life and love.  peace. 

family pics

its been a ridiculously busy week, but i thought you might enjoy a few pictures of the milinovich's in action this last week.  the picture of shannon and i above was taken by jackson at ard's farm, where we went with my parents this weekend.  the picture below of jack was also taken at ard's.  (by the way, if you are ever there for the breakfast buffet, get it.  seriously.  amazing.)

this picture of cade was taken yesterday after shannon made brownies and cade got to lick the bowl or the beaters or something.  in any case he ended up with quite the chocolate goatee, which he wore as a badge of honor for the remainder of the afternoon (along with the heinz ketchup bottle and pickle pins you can see on his shirt). 

okay, so this picture of quin and i wasn't taken this week, but i wish it was because i could use a nap.  we were honestly both sleeping here, and it was wonderful.  best.nap.ever.

and finally, this is just a recent pic of quin.  i was told that the last pics i posted of him didn't show his eyes enough, so here is one featuring the peepers.  he has either just seen:
A. the steelers week 1 loss to the ravens
B. me with my shirt off
C. a chainsaw weilding madman, or
D. lady gaga.

in any case, he looks terrified.  but you can see his eyes. 

(ps. the doctor checked him out this week and told us that he is in the 99th percentile for weight)

how great is our God

this last sunday i preached a sermon about how big our God is: the power and preeminence of God.  it was a fun sermon to preach, but rather than share it here, i wanted to share another sermon that i heard given by a guy named louis giglio.  i've never done this here on the blog before, and i don't expect many of you to really watch it all, but if you do, i think you'll find it worth it.  i don't know much about louis giglio, and so i can't really speak to his overall theology, and i can't even say i agree with everything he says here, but the overall point about the magnificence of God, and the very cool way he makes that point, is well worth the view.  there are 5 videos here which together make up the whole sermon (almost 45 minutes, in total).  God is so amazing. 

mo

i just want to stand up and give a hearty congratulations to mariano rivera.  yesterday he earned his 602nd save, the most of any baseball player ever. 

rivera will never get the attention of a derek jeter or a-rod, and it seems pretty clear that he's perfectly happy with that.  and what's more, he is arguably way better at his job than they are at theirs.  certainly no one has ever closed out games with such dominance, longevity, forgetfulness (a very important quality), and, perhaps most of all, grace. 

here's to you, mo.  i am proud to say you are a yankee.  keep up the good work. 

point made

i'm super busy today, so if you were expecting a full review of the steelers game, sorry.  it ain't happenin.' 

suffice to say that the steelers sufficiently showed that they are indeed, still alive, even if they have to play with wheelchairs and walkers.  they won definitively, shutting out the seahawks and not turning the ball over at all.  they better still be pretty embarassed about what happened in baltimore, because they still have a TON to work on, but it was nice to see them find the win column.  next week they've got the peyton manning-less colts who lost to the browns, so...um...yeah. 

go steelers!

saturday song: autumn and nick drake edition

well, while it is technically not autumn yet, the weather doesn't seem to be aware of the calendar's restrictions, and we've been experiencing all the telltale signs of fall here in central pa: crisp morning air; leaves beginning to turn, and dunkin' donuts selling pumpkin coffee (it's exquisite, seriously). 

fall is my favorite season.

there's just something about the combination of that crunchy chill, cider and football that appeals to my soul in a very profound way.  and while i can be a pretty fun guy (not a mushroom), i am drawn to the melancholy of autumn in a way i can't quite explain.  and so for saturday song, i thought i would introduce you to one of my favorite musicians of melancholy, the legend nick drake.  drake was british, and died in 1974, tragically, at the age of 26.  while he had a basically comfortable life, it was clear that drake never really felt comfortable in his own skin as a performer and really struggled with that.  that being said, he loved life and wrote and sang about it in delicate, tender, and beautiful ways.  he only recorded a handful of projects, but he's worth checking out if you enjoy beauty.  check out this song, "from the morning" as an example.  and happy autumn!

list of loves

some of the things i love right now:

jazz
watching a movie on a thursday night
the smell of a 6-week old's head
catching up with an dear friend
the anticipation of beginning a new book
the crispness of the morning
dunkin' donuts pumpkin coffee
people in the media writing off the steelers
singing loudly in the car
the spicy smells of autumn
sweater vests (in fact, a friend and i are conspiring to open a strictly sweater-vest clothing store, thinking of calling it "vested interest."  any investors out there want to take a chance on us?  our motto is: "you just show up, we'll take care of the vest."  you know you would shop there.)
short blog posts
aaaannnnndddd......
fridays.

ceramic clowns, busted tombstones and beautiful things

random stuff.  you know you like it. 

-just finished reading david sedaris' hilarious book "me talk pretty one day."  the expression LOL is not one i use, unless forced at gunpoint, but if it were ever appropriate, it would be in describing this book.  there were many moments where i literally guffawed (such a great word).  there were others were i was trying to hold it in, which simply resulted in the whole "santa-claus-bowl-full-of-jelly" thing that simply elicited disapproving stares from the others around me at the saturday night auction where i was reading it.  i would occasionally look up from my shaking book and bid on a box of star wars guys, before returning to sedaris' description of his dad's eating habits, LOLing all the way.  at one point i'm pretty sure the auctioneer interpreted a stray guffaw as a bid on a ceramic clown that, had i accidentally purchased it, would have given me night sweats for months. 

-we talk a walk last week and ended up walking around the local cemetery.  it's not far away, and a nice place to walk with kids without fighting traffic, so we often end up walking there.  caedmon noticed a grave stone with a statue of Jesus on it, and he delightedly proclaimed that he found where Jesus was buried.  i explained to him that it was just a statue of Jesus and i reminded him that where Jesus was buried the grave would be busted open because Jesus was no longer there (he is risen!).  i also told him that all of this occurred on the other side of the earth, but that must not of sunk in because a few hundred yards later he found an old, old stone that was crumbling apart and falling over.  less boisterous this time, with a real conviction, cade pointed to the rubbled old grave and almost whispered: look, that's where Jesus was buried!  while historically inaccurate, his sense of awe was nonetheless contagious and moving.  if only we all saw Jesus around us so readily. 

-been listening alot to a band called 'gungor' recently.  i guess they used to be called the michael gungor band.  i don't really know much about them, but i'm really digging the album called 'beautiful things,' especially the song by the same name.  it is my personal anthem right now.  i am currently leading a Bible/book study (we had 26 participants on monday!) called 'surprised by hope' based on the book of the same name by n.t. wright.  one of the main premises of the book is that God is building God's Kingdom on earth.  this whole concept is very foreign to so many of us who always thought of heaven as "up there somewhere."  we are exploring what the Bible actually has to say about this, and about what a "new heavens and new earth" might mean.  but i know this: when we are in Christ we are a 'new creation.  all the old has passed away.'  that doesn't mean that God throws us away and starts from scratch.  it means that - somehow - God makes us new.  which is what the One we call Redeemer will do with all of creation.  this song bears witness to that in a powerful way.  check it out below (includes all the lyrics). 



-and i will appropriately close with this: congrats to mariano rivera, the great closer of the new york yankees, on his 600th save.  only one other man has ever done that, and he ended up with 601.  so, go, Mo, go.  (one of my favorite sentences that i've ever written). 

i fought the law (who was wearing a fake moustache)

anyone who has had children probably knows the law of deferred attention: how you - the parent - then become the least important person in the whole family system.  whereas before, when your parents used to come see you and give you a hug and find out what's new in your life, interactions with your parents are now limited to handing them the baby and them vaguely thanking you for giving them grandchildren (but not with eye contact: they wouldn't dare break their loving gaze/stare at chubby mcChubberson who just vomited breast milk all over grandmas arms and shirt, resulting in praise and admiration, "awwwww...he's SOOOOOO cute" and so forth). 

this is true of blogs, as well.  i have a whole audience of readers who used to be interested in the actual words of the blog.  now, each entry is a complete and utter failure unless accompanied by pictures of quinton.  and the pictures are all that matter.  i could write a lengthy post about my new obsession with piercings and how it corresponds to all the experimental drugs i've been taking while juggling loaded firearms, but as long as it also included a picture of quin, i would get comments like, "so cute...can't wait to hold him again" and "BEST POST EVER!!!!"  yep.  the law of deferred attention.  i fought the law, and the law won. 

this little small(ish) dude has stolen my spotlight.

and rightly so, of course.  but still, he could pass a little credit my way, you know?  i mean, where would he be without me?  i think you know exactly where.  he'd be square in the limelight and not listening to me complain about it.  stinkin' little sheriff.  go ahead and stare at him.  if you need me (doubtful) you know where to find me:  i'll be in the armory practicing my juggling.

a bug's life

we have a budding entymologist in our house.  everyday we wakes up and tells me in a semi-awake way, "today looks like a great day for bug collecting."  it doesn't matter if the sun is shining or you can't see 6 inches in front of your face for the fog: it's a good day for capturing insects.  actually, as it turns out, it's always a good time for others to catch bugs: parents, friends, brothers, etc.  still, he loves the idea of it, and so we've got containers with bugs in various states of ill-health stowed all around the garage.  morally, i feel like i should be going through some amount of remorse or at least pity for these little multi-legged creatures, but i can't say that i do.  i mean, they could get eaten by something much bigger than them, and end up as lining the inside of a spider's abdomen, or they could die intact and end up with a pin through them under the admiring gaze of a 6-year old.  if i were a beetle near the milinovich house, i know which one i'd choose: the shiny pin and future of show-and-tell.  heck, it even looks like isaiah's vision of the new earth: the spider shall lie down with the beetle and the yellowjacket shall recline with the grasshopper.  it's peaceful, isn't it?  so, rest in peace, bugs.  enjoy your new-found life of fame.   

humble pie

well, since the steelers decided to take their first game off, i dont' see why i shouldn't take today off from blogging. 


seriously.  i just want to lie in bed, pull the covers over my head, and pout. 

but that had better not be what the steelers are doing.  they better be busy eating their humble pie.  all of it.  every last bite.  and i hope it serves them well.  it appears that they really needed to taste it, and i hope they get  more than their bellies full of it.

the only problem is that, at least to these eyes, it wasn't just that the steelers didn't seem to want it as much as the ravens (though that was clearly part of it), but that they just weren't as good at running, catching, blocking, tackling, coaching, and well, just about everything.  they weren't just out-willed.  they were plain out-played.  no amount of humble pie will fix that. 

sigh. 

at least it's monday.  well, at least there was this:

the yankees won, extending their al east lead as we approach october baseball.  my knee jerk self wants to say that at least i'll have baseball in october, but i know that it was just one game for the steelers, and there is a whole season to go.  but color me skeptical about their chances this year after laying that colossal egg. 

on to the next one.  let's go.  be great. 

'twas the night before steelers football (2011 edition)

i posted a version of this last year, but i thought it might be worth pulling out and dusting off since the season starts tomorrow and my level of amped-ness is approaching heights never before experienced by mere mortals.  i made a few changes from last year's poem.  enjoy!

‘Twas the night before kickoff and all through the “Nation,”

not a Stiller fan was stirring, due to some healthy libation.

The terrible towels were placed by the TVs with care,

in hopes that HD images of victory soon would be there.

The Steeler fans were sleeping, all snug in their beds,

while visions of hypocycloids danced in their heads.

And I in my black 86 jersey – Hines Ward -  

had just settled down after a prayer to the Lord.

When out in the family room, I heard such a noise,

I could have sworn it sounded like Big Ben and the boys.

I raced down the hall and into the den,

and couldn’t believe what I discovered then. 

There in the room (right on the couch!)

sat Tomlin and LeBeau – my wife will vouch.

And my jaw dropped in wonder as I stood with a stare

at the coaches before me – wow, what a pair!

Then my wonder grew deeper while I leaned on the wall,

as I watched Coach LeBeau stand up and call,

“Now Deebo, Now Potsie, now Timmons and Wood;

come out all you linebackers, you all are so good.

Now Ike, now Ryan, now B.Mac, keep on growing,

and now Troy, the magnificent ,with hair long and flowing. 

Now Diesel, now Smithy, come on now Big Snack,

it’s time to let loose the steel curtain attack!”

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

but the entire Steelers defense, inspiring fear. 

Then Tomlin stood up; he seemed strong – you should know it –

and he began to orate like a warrior poet. 

He spoke with grace, with words words tacit and true,

No doubts remained concerning victory: all who heard, knew. 

And he called forth the offense by name, one by one,

until each was there – can you imagine my fun?

 He called for Scott , Kemo, Essex, Pouncey and Colon;

Knowing the final version of the O-line was yet unknown.

He named Emmanuel, Antonio, Miller and Hines,

and the future hall-of-famer was smiling so wide.

He called for Big Ben, with leadership replete,

He looked ready to win, even if not “elite.”

He called for Rashard, who came in with a spin,

then the room got real quiet as they all leaned in. 

He spoke of week one – how the season would begin

By defeating the ratbirds, and chalking up a big win.

The team was all there – what a sight to behold –

it made me proud to be a fan of the great black and gold.

It felt so amazing, so good, just like heaven,

when I heard the team say they’d get trophy number seven.

And then in an instant they were gone with a howl,

so I stood there just waving my terrible towel.

It might have been a dream, for all I can say,

but I know that tomorrow they’ll be ready to play. 

While this night felt like a great Steelers party,

tomorrow they start fighting for that seventh Lombardi.

So sleep tight, Steeler Nation, ‘til the sun shines down bright;

happy game day to all, and to all a good night!

Go Steelers!

my 9/11 hope

"six years later"

paper collage on cardboard panel

2007

gregory a. milinovich

tomorrow is, of course, the tenth anniversary of the terror attacks aimed at the united states and it's symbols of financial, military, and political power.  while i may have nothing new to add to the conversation about this tragic event, i am nonetheless compelled to say something, as this story is one that will not let me go.  each year i get out a file of news clippings and reread the stories, allowing myself to feel again the feelings that were so fresh after that tuesday in 2001.  this year, as in past years, as i walk my own personal journey of remembering, i have watched oliver stone's world trade center, as well as united 93 and a dvd featuring the cbs news coverage from september 11, 2001.  some may assume that my fascination is morbid, but it isn't.  i simply find this story - a story that represents the end of something in america and the beginning of a new era - unbelievably compelling. 

this isn't for everyone.  for some, just going through it once was enough, and they never want to see another image of that plane entering the second tower, or of bodies falling dozens of stories to the manhattan floor below.  i understand that.  in fact, i would generally warn against watching too much of the footage of that day, or immersing yourself too deeply in this story because it can cause us to darken.  it can poison our hearts and allow us to sink into anger and even despair.   and while revisiting this story can cause me to re-experience all the feelings of fear, anger, confusion and a desire for revenge, those are not the lasting flavors for me.

i have hope. 

and it's not a hope about rebuilding.  it's not about reestablishing ourselves as a beacon of capitalism or a mecca of military might.  it's not a hope about revenge or snuffing out terrorism.  my hope, as naive as it may be, is about love. 

i have hope that a day is coming when people won't be filled with such hate that they feel validated in killing thousands of children, women and men just to try and make things right. 

i have hope that a day is coming when people won't dance in the street at the news of death - any death.

i have hope that a day is coming when people won't be judged by the slant of their eyes, the color of their skin, the clothes they wear, or the culture they grew up in.

i have hope that a day is coming when people can really work together, not just to remove rubble from a crash site, but to remove the obstacles that keep us from really helping one another on a global, national, and community scale. 

i have hope that the story of 9/11 won't be one with final chapters about death and revenge, about 10-year wars and osama bin laden. 

i have hope that this story will be about redemption, about learning that our decisions as a nation - all of them - about food and oil and technology and democracy, have a real if not measurable effect not just on "nations" but on real people in those nations (including us!). 

i have hope that 9/11 taught us that we aren't the only ones in this world. 

i have hope that 9/11 taught us to love our families better; to hold them tighter; to tell them we love them; and to prove it with our lives.

i have hope that 9/11 taught us that the heroes are us, or no one; that there comes a time when either we say "let's roll" or we sit back and watch death happen to us and others.

i have hope that when given the choice between life and death, we choose life, and not just for ourselves.

i have hope that when we sing "God bless America" we don't think that means that God shouldn't bless every other nation and person God created and adores.

i have hope that we will "never forget," not so that we can maintain an unhealthy angry patriotism, but so that we can learn to follow the lead of love in the little ways, which will all add up to making a difference in our global community, and will truly honor the fallen.

. 

i have hope that the survivors of this tragedy (you and i and all americans and all arabs and all those who still hate americans and who still hate arabs and so forth and so on) will live to tell a different story. 

i have hope that the plot can be twisted.

i have hope that we can follow the advice of the one who taught us to love our enemies, not dance in the street when they are killed.

 

i have hope that the Church of Jesus Christ will really learn to believe what we say we believe: that death has been defeated already, and that God's Kingdom - in which we are all citizens - is calling us to forgive as we have been forgiven. 

i have hope. 

and so i cannot sit by idly.  i cannot let myself sink into hate or even apathy.  i cannot let fear rule the day.  like those brave people on united flight 93, i must look square at the darkness in my own heart and say "let's roll."  i must face it head-on, so that the moments that make up my hours that make up my days that make up my weeks that make up my months that make up my years that make up my life will be about love, and not hate; welcoming and not marginalizing; embracing and not excluding; light and not darkness; community and not isolation; life and not death.  i must realize that if there is to be another chapter to the 9/11 story then it will need to be you and i that write it, and indeed we are writing it right now.  and what are we saying?  that we cared for awhile?  that we can have unity as long as we have a common fear or anger to bind us?  that we will be sickened to see others dance in the streets at the demise of our sisters and brothers, only to find ourselves dancing in our own streets at the death of one man?  will it be a story of status quo?  a story of apathy?  a story of despair?  or a story of hope?  a story of life?

i, for one, am choosing life.  i, for one, am choosing to believe that beauty can arise from the ashes, and that the beauty i believe in is not a building or a monument or even the warm fuzzies that come from the stories of survivors.  the beauty i believe in is life coming from death, light from darkness, hope from despair.

i have hope. 

...and so it begins

and so it begins.  the 2011 nfl season isn't even 24 hours old yet and already we are in full swing.  here in steeler nation we call it 'ravens week' and it refers to the twice-a-year (sometimes three times!) divisional matchups between the good guys (the steelers) and the epitome of evil (the baltimore purple browns.  why do i call them the purple browns, you ask?  well, because they are purple, first of all.  and seconly, because they are the one-time cleveland brown franchise that art modell ripped from the fabric of cleveland, relocating them to the city of ugly birds).  these are no mere football games.  these are grudge matches.  these are everything-hangs-in-the-balance battles between hope and despair, right and wrong, hines ward and ray lewis.  as much as the steelers-cowboys rivalry of the 70's epitomized the blue-collar/white-collar divide in america, this rivalry has become something even more universal: good vs. evil.  in recent years in this rivalry, the ravens have threatened to kill one of the steelers players; put a bounty out on trying to injure  certain steelers players; broke a rookie's collarbone and then screamed out with joy, "he's finished!"; spit into a steelers' players mouth; and punched the steelers quarterback in the face, breaking his nose so that the doctor said the insides "looked like corn flakes."  and those are just the "high"lights. 

this is the good guys vs. the bullies.

and so i do my part, here in my own little corner of steelernation, to pull my weight in this great tug-of-war conflict between all that is good and all that is wrong.    one of my favorite targets (it's almost too easy, really) is baltimore quarterback joe flacco, whose unibrow is epic and calls to mind that great paper clip collecting muppet of sesame street fame.  in fact, the two share more than a resemblance: it seems they have the same personality, as well.  it's why i created this image:

i also found this image of joe flaccid holding a pizza pie pan, and decided i'd spruce it up a bit with some steelers gear, since it seems like joe is really a closet steeler fan, having gone 0-6 against the steelers when ben roethlisberger is playing qb for the steelers.  he's has twice helped us advance in the playoffs in recent years, and it seems that under that ugly purple uniform is a black and gold t-shirt.  heck, he might even have a terrible towel or two in his closet (he did go to the university of pittsburgh, after all). 

and then i just have a few other images that i've made.  i need an outlet for my hate.  that's right, i said hate.  yes, my mother taught me not to say hate, but she also taught me to tell the truth.  so, yeah, conflicting advice.  i'm going with the "honesty is the best policy" one here.  so here we have steely mcbeam crushing the ravens like the dirty rat-birds that they are. 

and these last three are new.  they are simply expressions of my excitement that the season is about to begin, and that its about to begin in such an epic fashion.  the steelers have to go down to the "charm city" on sunday and into the bowels of hate and darkness and gloom in order to try and secure their first win of the season.  i hope they've all got their chin straps fastened securely and are ready to be spit on and punched and scratched and whatever else the raisins will try to do to gain an edge.  in the end, though, no matter what happens on sunday, good will always triumph. 

and finally, my favorite video ever.  after the game last season when the ravens punched ben in the face and broke his nose, my three-year-old son was visibly upset by the image of ben walking off the field with blood all over his jersey.  he asked me what happened and i told them that the ravens punched him in the nose and broke it.  he was so upset that i got out the video camera and captured his determination for revenge.  i think it's priceless.  you might enjoy it.  it's only a minute long.  even if you've seen it before, it's worth seeing again, just to get the juices flowing and the towels swirling. 

and if that didn't work, this one always does:  HERE WE GO, STEELERS!  HERE WE GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

cars, catfish and candy

i thought i would share some of the recent artwork of my boys, just to sort of document where they are in their development as budding artists and creators with color and lines and strange relationships.  for example, cade just drew a picture of me the other day with cherries and bananas on my head.  who knows?  these first two are by caedmon (he saws the bottom one is a car in the rain):

these next two are by jackson, who loves filling every possible void with color, even on his worksheets at school.  he just can't seem to bear to leave an square centimeter of blank paper.  the second one is "a catfish eating a fish.  and that fish has blood coming out of it." 

this last one is a list jackson made after taking inventory of all the candy he got at the 4th of july parade we go to every year in osceola mills, pa.  he did all the counting and writing himself!  he's growing up (and likely getting a mouthful of cavities!). 

ps.  pray for shannon.  the boys don't have school AGAIN today (two days in a row) due to flooding in our area, and she is at home all day with the three crazy boys.  i think she'll be needing a mani/pedi soon!